i like this skin too much to. :)

when you tell me of yourself,
im glad.
im happy im part of it,
and i really like it.
but its times like these,
i feel somehow,
that sometimes maybe,
im not as important.
its the pangseh feeling.
which i love to hate.
because sometimes i wonder,
when you're somewhere out there,
do you think of me?
because sometimes it hurts,
when im here and you're there,
and im supposed to be there,
but im not.
and i dread that.
watching korean shows at home alone makes it worse.
:'(
see lah park, your country.

ps. posts are now both in here and LJ, cause LJ people are lazy to cross over for a while.


"its one of those days i lie there and pity myself.

the time has come for changes.
blogger has been good,
thanks for all those times.

www.sillytrees.livejournal.com


"one more sad song.

even though its kinda ugly name,
yaknow liverfools.
anyway liver already sounds bad.
but dear torres is there.
even ive been neglecting him since world cup
BUTT, he's lookin' good mann. 0.0 heh heh
so how so how?
but stupid house has no cable so no epl nights anyways.
maybe i'll confirm my decision when we get mio or something that broadcasts epl.

whoohoo my nails are super long
super nice to sdo manicure :DD
but no, exams gonna end in few days and then trainings gonna start and,
HELLO UGLY FINGERNAILS.

double papers today
dont wanna think anymore.
over.
overoverover.
vivovo, whatevers done, is done.
focus on the next.
heck cpma and his rubbish.
must have pillow!!
:(

stupid jap videos time. whoopee.


"i looked inside, and saw your face.

remember this? :)

the sky was clear last night,
but the water that rolled down my face,
was rain.
because the tears i wanted to cry,
remained buried in my heart,
and yes it hurt,
alot.



was it you who spoke the words,
that things would happen but not to me,
things were going to happen,
naturally.

now i know how jason meraz forms lines that dont make sense.


''lets revise. so when im sad, what are you supposed to do?
you're supposed to put both arms around me, and squeeze tight.

I MISS MY YUNI DARLINGGG!!
life sucks without having her to bitch talk to sometimes.
its like we're two coherent waves.
always constructive, never destructive.
I LOVE YOU, BABY! <3
one more after promos :)

okayy study study study.


''Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

only to find..

THE SOCKS WERE ALL WASHED!!

it might be an anomaly but in the Gay household,
is always a race to do chores.
you see, ever since we stopped hiring a domestic worker,
mommy gay came up with an incentive system.
for the particular chore you do, you get paid.
ever since then, we race to 'chope' chores which are relatively easy and pay well hard,
while she races to do them so we cant earn that extra income.
SO SLY.
趁机当我在准备考试时没时间做就快点做!
(take advantage of the time i have to spend studying to do all the housework)
cheh, the unwillingness to pay is evident.
LOL.
what nonsense.
studying has driven me nuts.

shaun chook the horrible annoying BOY who thinks my head is a bobbing toy and pushes it all day. CHEH. vivoo's sooo obviously STRONGER than him i tell you, hmmph. whole day scold me lousy/never study/dahdahdah. you cham! one day ima shave off ALL your hair!


"Baby, baby, baby, if you really want me
Honey get some patience, maybe then you'll get a taste.

if lifes such a rush, how do you keep going and going.
how do you keep with the flow and not burn out.
sometimes i feel that the exams periods are the most relaxing for me.
cause all i do is study and eat and grow fat.
for that month or so, you're exempted from every concern.
covered under the umbrella of EXAMINATIONS.
no trainings no gyms no worship/mkc practices no outings etcetc,
its not that they're dreadful,
they're not.
its just that add every little thing together, it becomes alot.
and overdose is bad bad bad.
how long can we continue to be buoyed through the hustle and bustle of the education system,
thats stressful times ten to the power of six,
until either we finally reach the other bank
or unfortunately sink to the bottom of the deep blue sea.
and is there even an 'other bank'?
after school comes work which, from heresay,
makes school seem like a bed of pretty flowers.
thats why they have things like PW to facilitate our assimilation into the working world.
the answers to lifes questions are never really available.
answers come when we look for them
so if you dont look, you'll never know.
but thats not such a bad idea so to speak for,
ignorance is bliss.
innocence is brilliance.
maybe sometimes its better not knowing.
doesnt matter if it seems like im still a little kid.
maybe i am, or want to stay that way even.
a peak into adulthood has left me scrambling back under the covers,
like how a scary monster hiding in my closet will.
so much things to worry about
sometimes i wonder if i'd grow up right,
if i'll become a role model to my kids,
just like how my parents are trying to be to me.
i wonder if all the prophesies revealed to the church would come to pass.
and if my life is planned and woven into them already.
when the time comes will i follow my youthful ambitions or,
will i enter into something i never really thought of entering
yet somehow knew that i'd end up there.
questions of life are never really answered,
but i believe, in time,
you dont need an answer,
for you would have already lived out the question for yourself.

rainy days are for reflecting.
whether the words above make sense or not,
it dont matter.
cause i dont seek an answer.
i seek the answerer.

architecture/hotel management/teaching.
which?
i want to redesign my room.
post exam job number one!


the greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return


I follow the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin
To live again?

One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
What more could your Love do for me?
When will Love be through with me?

Why live life from dream to dream?
And dread the day when dreaming ends

One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
Why live life from dream to dream?
And dread the day when dreaming ends

One day I'll fly away
Fly, fly away


"sing of this song and i'll be there by your side.

wahh sheet.

integration 9.3 is freaking killer.
how the hell do you know what to substitute.
om tian, i wasa going nutsa.

okay screw mathh.
ima ace my geog and physics so well that i'll make your head spin.
so much you'll forget i even took econs or math.
(yeah bullshit)

i wonder why normen's ears turn so red at random times?
:D hmmm.


"sexy naughty bitchy me.

i dont know how to write.
my geog.
essay.

sheet.

schools overall came in second for slowpitch.
kinda funny since we were TRYING to win.
totally burnt and aching now.
howd i even manage to run today.
haha i outran a fumbled ball, so it means im fast?
hmm. ceri/yan outran a ball.
fullstop.
its like you see ceri/yan, then you see the ball.
im not of that calibre yet.
wells.
to them random guys who played a part in helping schools get this far, thankyou.
see you next year.


"爱像一阵风

AND I DREAM ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME.

i miss lina,
i realised that ive been neglecting her for quite long.
like, havent had our long long talks for superr long can.
like, i see her sundays but im always rushing off to play ball.
so in the end i dont really have the chance to have private talks.
quite sad, but nowsa busy busy time for us both.
your big project and my promos.
promise me you'll let me see the final product.
and we're gonna visit tiff at lasalle soon too!
yay!
(you know i love you when i dont see you for months but when i finally do, we just talk for hours like theres no tomorrow. :) )
i guess ive been neglecting quite alot of other people too.
especially those not in vj.
like those in vj im close to i see almost every school day lahh,
but others like TIFFANY and YUNI and LIYANA,
whom i spent my tk days going crazy with.
hardly see them now.
:(
kinda bad.
sorry guys.

slowpitch is kinda fun.
but its kinda slow too.
but not always.
like today i made a fool out of myself missing some fly ball.
like it was hit by some ang moh fella right to me.
(okayy they strong shit can)
stupid me thought i got it ready, then suddenly it moved super fast and went over my glove.
freaking stupid.
how could you man?!
stupid stupid stupid.
but yeah it was my bad.
its qute interesting to note that when you hit a fastpitch ball, when it flies to outfield it seems slower then when a slowpitch ball flies out.
like its sheer power man.
only those with power can do that, and sadly,
we girls are disadvantaged on that aspect.
sheesh.

hoho, i met caroline neighbour whosa ex rj softballer at kallang today!
whee, shes like one of the random few rj people i actually like.
(no, not all are waffles.. o.0)
annd, the funny part is, guess who was trying to pick her up?
:D sorry it wasa funneh sight to see.
i miss the time we three goh, gay, foo families gathered and we girls we poking fun at rong for cant remember what reason and finally ended up calling her mozzie. must be something baout mosquitos, or the fact she looks like one of something. :) those were the days..
(wah what you talking about ni tuu, like you damn old eh. )

sheet my tailbone is ducking pain.
why whyy whyyy.
argh.


"to grow old with you.

okay okay good good,
at least studyings starting somewhere,
whereever that is.

good news is,
i found a permanent chinese teacher.
he aint that good,
but he's more proficient than me,
so he qualifies.
haha!


"everybody's gonna love today!
(shit its stuck now, whos fault?)

I NEED TO STUDY. (sheet)

geog trip was kinda fun.
(as it should be, cause its GEOG.RAPHY)
contrary to popular belief,
there IS a river in singapore.
and its not the singapore river.
its a real full fledged river at macritchie.
today we did super cool geog stuff like measuring the width/ flow etcetc.
and trekked up a portion of the cold water.
(next time we're gonna find the source!!)
then went to see sorta slum beside a country club.
like, the contrast you know.
andd. lunch at maxwell.
uncle cheat me of my dessert cause i wanted almond jelly longan.
but he gave me ice jelly longan and said no more almond jelly :(
shit i should have went to get tauhuey. (darn.)
then was URA.
WHERE THEY HAD LOTS COOL MODELS!!!
as in, building models.
like they had the whold singapore in 3D models.
how cool is that.
the 'wanna be an architect' feeling in me came back.
i could sit the the model making room all day making models.
dream dream dream.
Q&A with URA people relations person was kinda -.-
cause most of the things we asked he went,
"Oh, that part is done by HDB, we do the planning of land areas only."
or,
"Oh, that part is done by LTA, we do the planning of land areas only."
or something like that.
like so waht in the blue world do they do?
basically plan. plan plan plan.
so did you know the marina bay IR area was planned already in 1979?
but URA was juat kinda waiting for demand to come, for them to release the area to be developed. so while they waited, they used the marina area as a TREE FARM.
like, you know those 'instant trees' we all see?
it used to come from marina bay.
cant you just picture it?
MARINA BAY INSTANT TREE FARM!
humble beginnings indeed.
then more cam whoreing around.
try not to get mr josef tan to take pictures for you.
he'll make you wait/ trick you into standing in the rain for damn long/ trick you into falling/ or something along those lines.
(pictures would come when belle sends them)

so how would like my skinny tree?
um, deep friend/ roasted/ toasted/ RAW. :O


"我想就這樣牽著妳的手不放開