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Saturday, July 29, 2006
sentimental day.

i made a new friend. he's call aaron and works in kallng mac's and he's like the cutest thing ever. ah haha. im so smitten. lol.he looks so shy and adorable. ahhh. too bad he smokes :( i hope i see him tomorrow. tralala~

todays game was quite ok. throw wasnt bad. yay. but i need to learn to stop wild pitches better. the runs mostly came in cause of that. shucks. i could feel my throw today so i could do plays. ah the j2s not coming tmr. aww. too bad. i'll miss queen. [excuse me, those whose minds are cranky, i straight.so please dont be dumb. if you are still unsure, look above] anywayy, i'll miss playing with her. its the only time that i've played in the same team as that batch. they rock man. stable and good. aiy. i'll so miss going home with my ouxiang and treating her like my bony pillow and all. and conning her into treating me stuff. haha bestest senior ever. im working hard on yr present. accumulative of two years. you better love it. theres mainly the 4 of them, queen yan meilin and poot. i dont really know the rest. yan: my ouxiang catcher. always pangsehing me but i dont blame you. A's are important :D . and meilin: my hero. really go all out when playing. and who held my bottle captive for so long. and destroyed my colourflash. haha. and poot: my fellow pasir ris dweller. its so nice to catch for a pitcher who actually fields balls. makes me feel more safe. haha and her market value very high eh, can field can bat can pitch. lol

this is turning into some dedication thing. ohwell. i'll miss you guys.

annd. ive not been to church service for such a long time. i hope like the youths are still filled with enthuness and zeal to dance before God. cause He so deserves all the honour. its fun too. i love dancing. and i miss my bestie. such a sentimental day today. tmr's the last combined schools game. its been fun, i wanna do it again next year!

cant think anymore. i want sleep. ooh ooh. massage. daddy and mommy bought the massage chair. so fun! :DD


hmmamm.10:24 pm

Monday, July 24, 2006
we lost! again!

zion played that team from dunno where yesterday again. its like the freaking third time. but there's an improvement. we lost 4-2 only. i remember the first time was like 11-1 or something. ohwell. dicky sccored one goal. and he dedicated it to me. haha so sweet.
and i was telling tim how irritated i was with his cousin. i dunno what to do. just hate it has to be this way. you was so darn nice. and now you're like so darn cold. i hate that. and i want the old you back. please?


hmmamm.2:09 pm

Thursday, July 20, 2006
injuries ahoy!

it just seems injuries are attracted to me like houseflies are to light [?]

sucks big time. like i one week i can scrape my knee, bend my fingernail[and no its not the 'i think i chipped a fingernail' kind, its the 'half the nail totally bent up because of impact of the ball' kind] and yesterday, like these two pieces of glass that were suppoesd to cover my shelf above my work table just fell on my head? like what the hell? it bonked on me super hard head and crashed on the floor. amazing thing is only one broke. the other was still in one big piece. must be the cusioning of my head. lol. i had totally no mood to study after that so i started making assessories again.

oh yeah im so happy my juniors won the game against crescent. shila told me the score was 11-7, but this morning jkong announced the score was 12-5. [?] huh. ohwell. tomorrow's the fajar game. haha i wanna film it! andd. slight improvement with the hadyai situation. like mommy's still reluctant and the only thing thats still bugging her is the terrorist thing. the rest are cleared. so its just her worried for my safety. justifiable, but i prefer to entrust my life in God's hand. :]

and that thing is slowly affecting me. like i dont even know what i did wrong and why im being ignored. i should just forget but its not like its nothing and i can jsut throw it away like that. you touched my heart and gave me hope, but i guess i was just being so delusional, evidence being the lack of response these few weeks. im pissed big time. but its not within my control so i shall just sit by and sulk.

''im so sick of love songs, so tired of tears, so done with wishing, that you are still here.


hmmamm.10:39 am

Tuesday, July 18, 2006
years between.

yesterday was my dad's birthday.
so we surprised him with this cake.
everyone: breadtalk's cakes are going at half price. as i was very happy to find out.

then later mommy said this sundays the soccer match and i should go for that rather than training. and she was all like 'how come you dont wanna go. your heart throb playing know' and i was so blur like who? dicky ah? cause there was a period of time when she thought i liked dicky [sorry but no] then it dawned on me that she meant tim. haha wth. he's too lod and he has a girlfriend and i had the courage to tell her i thought his cousin was cuter :D. anyway. i confessed i injured my finger cause of the softball and not because i slammed my hand into/between the door. i cant lie properly without feeling so darned guilty..she wasnt angry just disappointed that i thought she was this knida xiao qi person. ahh. i love my mommy :]
ohwell.. i dunno how my parents survive with each other. they're like 11 years apart. my daddy turned 56 yesterday. tho he sure dont look it. but for me, i dont think i'd like the age gap between my guy and i to be so huge, though in the working world it dont really matter.. but 2 years would be good :)


hmmamm.2:03 pm

Thursday, July 13, 2006
start of something new

Living in my own world

Didn't understand

That anything can happen

When you take a chance

I never believed in

What I couldn't see

I never opened my heart

To all the possibilities

I know that something has changed

Never felt this way

And right here tonight

This could be the start

Of something new

It feels so right

To be here with you

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart

The start of something new

Now who'd of ever thought that

We'd both be here tonight

And the world looks so much brighter

With you by my side

I know that something has changed

Never felt this way

I know it for real

This could be the start

Of something new

It feels so right

To be here with you

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart

The start of something new

I never knew that it could happen

Till it happened to me

I didn't know it before

But now it's easy to see

It's a start

Of something new

It feels so right

To be here with you

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart

That it's the start

Of something new

It feels so right

To be here with you

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart

The start of something new

Start of something new


love this song. it says all that i feel right now :]


hmmamm.10:34 am

Sunday, July 02, 2006

benben just told me a story.

There was once this guy who was studying for his exams which is coming in abt 2 mths time ..
then he pasted these words "Let God" on his wall
something like "Let God" do his will
or "Let God" help him..
to remind him its God's powers to help him..
So everytime he studies he will look up on his wall to remind him..
but everytime when he studies till his max .. like already super tired ..
he looks up on the wall and see the word "Let God"
den guess wat he tells himself
yeah i gotta let God do the work.. but i also cant totally not work ..
so even though he is so exhausted he continues to study
but then as the days goes by he gets more and more tired..
because everytime he sees the words he forces himself to study harder
finally just about one week before the exams.. something phenomena happened
a strong wind blew while he was studyin
and one of the letter came off
guess which one
it was the letter D
because he kept saying let God
but he didnt ma.. he still kept holding on saying that its not enough and forced himself to study more
so i guess God meant to ask him to let go..

imspirational. im gonna do just that. or at least try to.
i think its just what i needed.
ive been asking God to help me with all this shit thats happening in my life right now but the thing i forgot to do is just to let go

i choose to be happy.
and i choose to let go.
whatever shit that happens i will turn to God .
to forgive is not to forget. but to forget is to forgive.
that means you dont remember it anymore because that episode of life is over and you've moved on.
then i choose to forget.

i feel lighter already.
my heart weighs less.
thankyou benben for making a difference in my life today :]


hmmamm.10:24 pm

SHEEPIE
Joanne Gay
Victoria Junior College

play around with the sheep on top :)

BAA!


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